Melissa Costello

Author Archives: Melissa Costello

November 7, 2021

Ep. 22: Build Consistency with Exercise in a New Way with Elana

Ep. 22: Build Consistency with Exercise in a New Way with Elana

DESCRIPTION

Consistency! It’s one of those things that many of us struggle with. How do we build it, whether it’s with exercise, our eating habits, our spiritual practice, our self care?

There are many obstacles that can stand in the way of building consistency; time, money, lack of energy, not believing we can do it….

In today’s coaching episode with Elana, you will get to hear one woman’s experience in wanting to build consistency with exercise, which is a priority to her, but she doesn’t make it happen. This leads her to feeling like a constant failure when it comes to her self care.

Elana has good intentions, and knows how important exercise is, but her “lack of time” is often a factor in not staying true to her intentions.

What we uncover through this episode, beyond the excuses, is faulty thinking and limiting beliefs. The way Elana is relating to exercise is what is keeping her stuck, along with some core limiting beliefs around worthiness that stand in the way of her consistency.

As we dive into those beliefs and start to understand more about Elana’s thinking we uncover a pretty harsh inner critic that is always telling her she’s not doing enough, or she isn’t enough.

This seems to be consistent across the board for many people who have trouble building consistency with anything in their lives. Beyond the excuses lies the core reasons we don’t stay consistent and that is how Elana and I shift her approach to building consistency.

Here are my 3 Keys for Building Consistency

  • Pick something Simple and Aligned: I’m going to move my body in a way that feels good each day, or I’m going to add more greens into my diet. Often we will pick things that we think we "should" be doing, versus what we really want to do.
  • Start Small: start with 10 minutes and then add from there, or add in two green salads per week.
  • Let go of HIGH Expectations and Big Promises: don't make a huge promise or expect that you are going to be perfect with whatever you are building consistency with. Allow yourself to be HUMAN and know it will never be perfect. Focus on each day, and celebrate what you DO do, instead of focusing on what you didn’t do.


RESOURCES:
Equine Partnered Coaching Experiences: https://karmachow.com/equine-partnered-coaching/

Tired of struggling with food and your weight? Download my Food Freedom Guide HERE and take your power back from food today!

If you want to get some free coaching around a specific issue or challenge you are facing, be a guest on my show and let’s work it out together and help you Come Home to what truly matters; book a session here.

Find Melissa on her social media platforms:

Instagram: @melcostellocoach
LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/groups/2004687
Youtube: www.youtube.com/user/karmachow
Website: www.karmachow.com

November 1, 2021

Ep. 21: Stop Listening to Weight Loss Experts with Zilla

Ep. 21: Stop Listening to Weight Loss Experts with Zilla

DESCRIPTION

Weight loss is a frustrating and often unreachable goal. Many of us seek out experts to find the answers, only to end up disappointed and defeated.

In this coaching episode with Zilla, she comes to the session feeling confused and frustrated by her weight loss goals. She's been following a pretty restrictive plant-based diet and has hit a plateau after losing some weight. She's part of a very well-known plant-based community with a weight loss "expert" who promises the world.

Zilla finds herself constantly comparing herself to many others in the community who are having stellar results. This makes her feel worse and to seek out other experts via webinars, podcasts and the like so she can finally find the answer to her weight loss.

I think you will find this episode a bit surprising and refreshing at what I tell Zilla that I hope will inspire you to STOP trying to find the next holy grail or expert that will promise you weight loss.

When listening, consider how many times you've tried to lose weight and have felt like a failure only to be caught up in the vicious  cycle over and over again.

RESOURCES:

If you struggle with emotional eating, stress eating or yo-yo dieting, download my Food Freedom Guide HERE and take your power back from food today!

If you want to get some free coaching around a specific issue or challenge you are facing, be a guest on my show and let’s work it out together and help you Come Home to what truly matters; book a session here.

Find Melissa on her social media platforms:

Instagram: @melcostellocoachLinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/groups/2004687Youtube: www.youtube.com/user/karmachowWebsite: www.karmachow.com

October 21, 2021

Ep. 20: Radical Acceptance and Our Bodies with MFT Shirley Johnson

Ep. 20: Radical Acceptance and Our Bodies with MFT and Founder of Soulistic Wellness, Shirley Johnson

DESCRIPTION

For many women, body acceptance can feel impossible and intangible. It’s a concept that seems hard to grasp, especially because we are conditioned from a very young age that our bodies equal our value. This starts a vicious cycle of yo-yo dieting, body shame and self-hatred for many women.

In this episode, Melissa chats with licensed psychotherapist and healing practitioner, Shirley Johnson. Shirley grew up in a multi-racial family and went on her first diet at the age of 10. She spent years yo-yo dieting, and fighting with her body while receiving mixed messages about it from different sides of her family. 

Shirley shares about her very vulnerable and long -long journey around loving and accepting her body, as well as the recent struggles she has experienced with weight gain during the pandemic. She believes that the recent weight is a teacher for learning next levels of self-love and self-acceptance. 

Shirley and Melissa also go deep into the industrial, modern, hyper consumer culture that has created a huge disconnect for humans with their body, and being out of touch with the earth and our own internal nature. Our bodies are now seen as a vehicle for consumption or to make money from, or to make someone else feel good instead of our own deeper connection to ourselves.

If you have been struggling with your body, weight gain, or feeling as though you never have accepted yourself or your body, then this episode offers deep insights and truths around how you can turn toward yourself and  heal the core wounds that keep you from fully loving and accepting your body.

Based in Oakland, CA by way of The Bronx, NY, Shirley has alchemized fifteen years experience of exploration of self and specialized training in astrology, energy work, psychology and yoga into a passionate profession: restoring intimacy and vulnerability in the collective consciousness through community building and healing.  

Shirley is a sought after speaker for various events and training on mental health and wellness, intimacy, and race She is also a contributor and lead trainer to yoga teacher trainings based around the country.  In her private practice, Shirley works with adults and couples and specializes in codependency recovery, communication, intimacy, and vulnerability, especially in Black women


RESOURCES:

Get more information on the upcoming series: Black Women Breaking up with Caretaking and Codependency

Follow Soulistic Wellness on her social platforms:

Instagram: www.instagram.com/soulisticwellnessFacebook: www.facebook.com/SOULISTICWELLNESSWebsite: www.soulisticwellness.com

If you struggle with emotional eating, stress eating or yo-yo dieting, download my Food Freedom Guide HERE and take your power back from food today!

If you want to get some free coaching around a specific issue or challenge you are facing, be a guest on my show and let’s work it out together and help you Come Home to what truly matters; book a session here.

Find Melissa on her social media platforms:

Instagram: @melcostellocoachLinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/groups/2004687Youtube: www.youtube.com/user/karmachowWebsite: www.karmachow.com

October 15, 2021

Ep. 19: The Power of Style to Transform Your Life with Style Coach, Erin Mathis

Ep. 19: The Power of Style to Transform your Life with Style Coach, Erin Mathis

DESCRIPTION

In the era of ageism, it’s increasingly hard for women to embrace their natural aging. We are constantly exposed to beauty influencers through social media along with unrealistic images, photos and ideals in mainstream media, which makes it even more challenging for women to cultivate a unique sense of self or to have a positive self-image.

In this episode, Melissa chats with Style Coach, Erin Mathis. Erin teaches midlife women how to create an authentic style that helps them make the impact they want to have and to feel confident about their own image. 

Erin believes that women can use style as a secret weapon to help build confidence and that it has the power to change the trajectory of our lives, without it being complicated. She fully believes that style is only one piece of your whole self, and we must do our inner work as well to be able to exude confidence and well-being from the inside out

Erin shares the story of her own style transformation, and also discloses the personal challenges she had in her life when she was overweight and struggling with anxiety and depression. Through using style to give her a confidence boost, she was able to embrace herself in the here and now instead of waiting until she lost weight or her body changed.  

As we age, everything changes. The makeup techniques we used in our 30’s no longer work, our hair changes, our bodies change.  We also go deep into what it means to embrace aging and all the changes that come along with it and how having a unique sense of style can help with that process. 

Even if style is NOT your thing, or you don’t feel like a stylish person, Erin’s episode shines a light on how making simple changes in your style and self-image can make all the difference in how you show up in the world and feel about yourself. 

Co-founder of The Style Core, Erin Mathis helps empower women to take charge of the future. From her hometown in Northern California, she coaches women around the globe and guides her clients to reinvent themselves so they can confidently show the world who they really are and align their image with the impact they want to make through her simple 7-step process.

Catch Erin online through her signature transformational program, Create Your Million Dollar Look.

RESOURCES:

Check out Erin's TEDx Talk, The Power of Image to Transform Your Life

Do you want to feel confident, relevant, and stylish? Get “The Top 5 Steps to Up-Level Your Style” Guide HERE

Follow The Style Core

Instagram: www.instagram.com/stylecorelifeFacebook: www.facebook.com/stylecorelifeWebsite: www.erinmathis.com

If you struggle with emotional eating, stress eating or yo-yo dieting, download my Food Freedom Guide HERE and take your power back from food today!

Get some free coaching around a specific issue or challenge you are facing! Come be a guest on my show and let’s work it out together and help you Come Home to what truly matters; book a session here.

Join my FREE Facebook Group, Reclaim Your Wild: A Radical Self-Care + Self-Discovery Group for Women

Find Melissa on her social media platforms:

Instagram: @melcostellocoachLinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/groups/2004687Youtube: www.youtube.com/user/karmachowWebsite: www.karmachow.com

October 7, 2021

Ep. 18: Build Confidence in Your Young Girls with Meredith Essalat

Ep. 18: Build Confidence in Your Young Girls with The Honest Teacher, Meredith Essalat

DESCRIPTION

In this Expert Series episode, we discuss what parenting looks like in today's world where social media is pervasive in the lives of youngsters. In the age of apps like Photoshop and FaceTune, how do we advise and support our children's body image as they are growing and being exposed to unrealistic ideas about their bodies? 

It is becoming increasingly challenging to create an atmosphere in which our children can embrace their bodies, despite the unrealistic body norms that social media and the media in general, highlight. 

As a parent, being proactive and learning how to create limits on the consumption of social media, as well as educating our children on how to view their bodies in a healthy way is key to building their self-esteem and confidence.

Meredith Essalat, a K-8 school principal in San Francisco, CA, and author of The Overly Honest Teacher: Parenting Advice from the Classroom, joins us as our special guest. Meredith herself struggled with an eating disorder at a young age, and understands what it’s like to have an dysfunctional relationship with food and her body. 

 Before becoming a principal, Meredith worked in middle school teaching for nine years as a teacher and the Dean of Middle School Curriculum. She has a BA in Mass Communication, a California-Clear Multiple Subject Teaching Credential, an M.Ed. in Curriculum and Instruction, and an M.Ed. in Educational Leadership, and she now calls sunny California home.

Join us as we discuss the importance of supporting our children and how they see their bodies,  and what we, as parents and guardians can do to remove the stigma and help our children feel confident and valuable in the world.

RESOURCES:

 If you’re looking to embrace everyday parenting gracefully, please check out Meredith's bookThe Overly Honest Teacher: Parenting Advice from the Classroom

If you’re looking for a radical, merciful, transformational book that will give you deep insights, inspiration, and concrete tools for launching the revolution right inside your own beloved body, purchase The Body is Not an Apology

Follow The Overly Honest Teacher

Instagram: www.instagram.com/overlyhonestteacher

Facebook: www.facebook.com/overlyhonestteacher

If you struggle with emotional eating, stress eating or yo-yo dieting, download my Food Freedom Guide HERE and take your power back from food today

Get FREE coaching around a specific issue or challenge you are facing. Be a guest on my show and let’s work it out together and help you Come Home to what truly matters; book a session here.

Come join my FREE Facebook GroupReclaim Your Wild: A Radical Self-Care + Self-Discovery Group for Women

Find Melissa on her social media platforms:

Instagram: @melcostellocoachLinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/groups/2004687Youtube: www.youtube.com/user/karmachowWebsite: www.karmachow.com


September 30, 2021

Ep. 17: Reflections of a Fat Girl with Ilene Leshinsky

Ep. 17: Reflections of a Fat Girl with Body Image Specialist and Author, Ilene Leshinsky

DESCRIPTION

As women, many of us struggle with loving and accepting our bodies. Culturally we are programmed by what we see in the media and by diet culture, and it’s detrimental to the way we view ourselves. 

 In today’s episode, Melissa dives deep into body acceptance with Ilene Leshinksy, a psychotherapist, teacher, body image specialist, creator of Find Body Freedom, and author of "Reflections of a Fat Girl.”  

Ilene deemed herself a fat girl many years ago because of what she heard growing up from her peers as well as her parents and grandparents . Messages of being “too thin” or being told she shouldn’t eat certain things left her confused and disconnected.

By the age of 5, she was a very overweight child by society’s standards, and that had a horrific effect on her self-esteem and confidence. She had no idea how to listen to her body and understand her satiety, so this led to many years of overeating and dysfunction with food.

Listen in as Melissa and Ilene both discuss their childhoods and the origins of their body image stigma. Take note of what these two incredible women have to say about body appreciation and learning to live in our bodies and be pleased with them is the key to food and body freedom.

They also dive into the negative and toxic impact of ads and social media when it comes to body image among women and men. 

Ilene’s program, Find Body Freedom, was created for women who wish to transform their attitude regarding their bodies and how they look at food. 

She works with women of all ages who want to feel good about themselves AND transform their relationship to food so they can feel free and empowered with their eating.

 RESOURCES:

If you resonated with what Ilene shared, please check out her book here, Reflections of a Fat Girl.

Follow Ilene here:

Instagram: www.instagram.com/findbodyfreedomFacebook: www.facebook.com/findbodyfreedom

Struggling with emotional eating, stress eating or yo-yo dieting? Download my Food Freedom Guide HERE and take your power back from food today!

If you want to get some free coaching around a specific issue or challenge you are facing, be a guest on my show and let’s work it out together and help you Come Home to what truly matters; book a session here.

Come join my FREE Facebook Group, Reclaim Your Wild: A Radical Self-Care + Self-Discovery Group for Women

Find Melissa on her social media platforms:

Instagram: @melcostellocoachLinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/groups/2004687Youtube: www.youtube.com/user/karmachowWebsite: www.karmachow.com

September 22, 2021

Ep. 16: Set Boundaries + End People Pleasing with Chris

Ep. 16: Set Boundaries + End People Pleasing with Chris

DESCRIPTION

In this coaching episode, Chris comes to the call with a question about overeating, especially in social situations. She finds herself feeling out of control with desserts, and also wonders how to STOP eating when there is food left on her plate because she doesn't want to waste it. She often ends up feeling overly full and guilty afterwards.

The “Clean Your Plate Club,” as Melissa calls it, is very common especially among generations who had parents that were raised in the Depression. Chris also shares that her mother was always monitoring her food, which often left her feeling deprived and wanting more. 

As Melissa dives in to discover more about Chris’ life,  she discloses her past experiences with dieting and her weight. She has been a long time dieter and felt successful at it at one time, but since the pandemic, she has put on a lot of weight and hates how she feels in her clothes. She is very attached to numbers on the scale and what they mean in terms of her self-worth. 

Chris also shares that she suffers from anxiety and stress that are a conglomerate of her past and present life experiences. As Melissa inquires more about this, we learn that Chris has a very hard time setting boundaries and is also a huge people pleaser, which creates even more stress in her life and leads her to eat to soothe herself. 

Many of Chris’ behaviors are linked to a fear of not being a good person, so Melissa gives Chris some powerful strategies to help her shift this way of thinking, as well as manage her anxiety through boundary setting so that she can engage in the things she loves to do for herself without guilt. 

If you've ever had a hard time setting boundaries, or felt anxious and stressed out because you have a deeper fear that people won’t like you, and you tend to turn to food or some other outlet to soothe yourself, then be sure to listen to the entire podcast so you can learn some powerful tactics to support your own well-being.

RESOURCES:
If you are interested in learning more about The Whole-Hearted Woman Community Forum, click HERE to get on the waitlist today.
If you struggle with emotional eating, stress eating or yo-yo dieting, download my Food Freedom Guide HERE and take your power back from food today! 

Come join my FREE Facebook Group, Reclaim Your Wild: A Radical Self-Care + Self-Discovery Group for Women

Find me on Instagram: @melcostellocoach

Website: https://karmachow.com/

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/groups/2004687/

Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/user/karmachow

September 16, 2021

Ep. 15: End Emotional Eating + Improve Self Esteem with Ashley

Ep. 15: End Emotional Eating and Increase Self-Esteem with Ashley

DESCRIPTION

In today's episode  Melissa coaches Ashley, who explains how weight gain is slowly eating away at her self-esteem. She has struggled with weight loss for most of her life and is eager to overcome her emotional eating habit that has amplified during the pandemic. 

Melissa investigates further to learn about Ashley’s daily routine, including what she puts in her body,  her workouts and sleep patterns.  She discovers that Ashley is experiencing mental health issues that may be evolving from what she is eating,  as she seems to be tired and sluggish even after a good nights  sleep.

Melissa deduces that Ashley’s dependence on empty, convenience-type foods  is  a contributing factor to her not feeling sustained throughout the day.   As she digs a bit deeper, she discovers that Ashley also suffers from stress eating,  anxiety and panic attacks as well.

Even though Ashley has a lot of good foundational pieces in place for her self-care routine, her lack of emotional and mental support is a big contributor to her stress eating and weight gain. In order to relieve herself of stress and panic attacks, Melissa  helps Ashley come up with solution oriented actions she can take to support herself and her mental well-being.

Busy scenarios and hectic schedules in today’s world often lead us away from our goals and perspectives due to lack of focus, energy and mental-health support. As human beings, it is our prime responsibility to identify the root cause of every situation and take solution-oriented action to  lead a healthier and less stressful life. Self-esteem walks hand in hand with self-belief and  the only way to strengthen self-esteem is to identify and address the underlying beliefs, and build practices to support the cultivation of it.  

Tune in to the podcast now to understand the key factors that lead to a stressful life and effective ways to rebuild self-esteem, nurture your mental health and your shattered life.

RESOURCES:

If you feel lost, stuck and unsure about where your life is headed, set up a time to chat with me for free and learn more about my one-on-one coaching. Together we will come up with a solid action plan to help you move forward right now. Click here to  book a session now

If you struggle with emotional eating, stress eating or yo-yo dieting, download my Food Freedom Guide HERE and take your power back from food today! 

Come join my FREE Facebook Group, Reclaim Your Wild: A Radical Self-Care + Self-Discovery Group for Women

Find me on Instagram: @melcostellocoach

Website: https://karmachow.com/

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/groups/2004687/

Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/user/karmachow

September 8, 2021

Ep. 14: Speak Up and Let Your Voice Be Heard with Malika Amandi

Ep. 14: Speak Up and Let Your Voice Be Heard with Malika Amandi

DESCRIPTION

In today's male-dominated industries, women often go unnoticed primarily due to their ability to express themselves and communicate effectively without apologizing.

In today's episode, we have with us Malika, the founder of The Center for Women's Voice. Malika coaches professional women, helping them through their communication barriers and transforming prime areas of their life.

According to Malika, repeated apologizing from women turns into a habit over prolonged exposure and that itself suppresses their inner self and their abilities. In order to gain control of a situation and make yourself heard, it is imminent to refrain from apologizing unnecessarily.

Women have to take their stand and go against the long followed culture of our society and set examples for themselves in order to get noticed. Things simply don’t fall into line unless someone decides to speak for themselves and challenge the cultural programming.

Effective communication is a key survival skill provided we make sure to clearly state our priorities and values and confront situations instead of remaining silent

Tune in to the podcast and discover the secrets to make yourself heard.

Get your free copy of Malika's BREATHE method here:  https://mailchi.mp/949616c4466f/the-center-for-womens-voice
Follow Malika on Instagram: @centerforwomensvoice
If you are a woman who is constantly giving, people-pleasing and over doing it, click here to check out the book Burnout; The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle by sisters, Emily and Amelia Nagoski.
If you want to get some free coaching around a specific issue or challenge you are facing, be a guest on my show and let’s work it out together and help you Come Home to what truly matters; book a session here.

Website: https://karmachow.com/Reclaim Your Wild Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/634365606716567Instagram: @melcostellocoachLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/groups/2004687/Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/user/karmachow

July 16, 2021

Ep. 13: Believing + Owning Your Worth with Kimberly

Ep. 13: Believing + Owning Your Worth with Kimberly

DESCRIPTION

What does it feel like when you receive a compliment? Do you deflect by complimenting back immediately or feel undeserving of the praise?

My caller today Kim has struggled with her self worth and accepting compliments and feedback from others. She turns the feedback or compliment into something negative about herself, because she doesn’t believe herself to be worthy of the compliment.

During the episode we untangle her limiting beliefs around WHY she can’t accept compliments and how they trigger her lack of self-worth. 

Kim believes that if she is truly worthy of a compliment, she will no longer be motivated to improve, despite not knowing when she WILL actually FEEL worthy. We trace this belief of never being good enough to its source, and it is a wound that has been present for years without her even recognizing it

Kim and I break down why she has such a difficult relationship with compliments and I help her re-frame receiving compliments in a way that she can more easily approach. I also give her several strategies to begin to heal the core wound that has led to her feelings of low self-worth (we all have one)

If you struggle with your self worth, feeling like you are good enough, or receiving compliments from others because you don’t feel you deserve them, then I believe Kim’s session today will be a great listen to find some insight on how to re-frame compliments, accept them with grace and heal any core wounding you have that keeps you from seeing your own worth and value. 

RESOURCES

If you want some free coaching around a struggle or challenge you are facing, be a guest on my show and let’s work it out together and help you Come Home to what truly matters; book a session here.

If you have been stuck in the vicious yo-yo diet cycle and want to break out of food prison and end emotional eating, then check out my 7 Step Food Freedom Guide: https://karmachow.com/food-freedom-guide/

Find the book Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle by Dr. Emily Nagoski herehttps://amzn.to/2ST4nT0

Come join my FREE Facebook Group, Reclaim Your Wild: A Radical Self-Care + Self-Discovery Group for Women

Find me on Instagram: @melcostellocoach

Website: https://karmachow.com/

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/groups/2004687/

Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/user/karmachow

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